On Friends

My post title seems stunningly inadequate, and for that, I apologize. I really want to talk about the people in our lives who influence and teach us.

I firmly believe that specific people are brought into our lives-- at specific times in our lives-- for a reason. There are moments in your life when there is one particular person who is specially equipped to help you, to teach you, to inspire you, to comfort you, to give you direction.

When my husband and I were praying about where he should go to grad school, we prayed to know where we should go and where we could do the most good. A long story made short, we received "a lightning bolt answer" that we should go to St. Louis. We even felt pretty strongly about which apartment complex we should live in. As a result, we ended up in a ward that we love. (Somehow, the word 'love' doesn't seem strong enough to describe my feelings about this ward. I tear up just thinking about having to leave in a year.)

I don't know how much good we have done in our ward, but I do know how much good the ward has done us. The Lord has put these people in our lives-- in a specific time in our lives-- for us to learn from, be counseled by and receive help from our ward.

A specific example: I began to have some serious problems with my joints right after my daughter was born. That same month, I got a new visiting teacher, the Stake President's wife. Well, the Stake President just happens to be a rheumatologist!

Coincidence? I don't believe so.

I KNOW that the Lord knows me and knows what I need. Better yet, he knows who can help me and leads them to me when I need them.

I guess this all boils down to the fact that God is in charge. And I just wanted you to know that I know that's true.

Be a Friend

My younger brother got home from his mission last week. He served in Frankfurt, Germany-- the land of our ancestors, and he very obviously grew (spiritually and physically).

He described the work in Germany as difficult because of the lack of support from members. The Germans are a very private, NOT very outgoing, stay-in-my-comfort-zone sort. My brother said that if they were going to bring an investigator to church, they'd have to call like 20 people the night before to give them a heads-up and ask them just to say hi to the investigator. And on Sunday, still no one would.

This shocked me! How sad for these new investigators! To not feel welcome or meet a potential friend! It can be a culture-shock for people to come into a brand-new church, why wouldn't anyone want that culture to appear friendly and inviting?

President Gordon B. Hinckley said:

“It is not an easy thing to become a member of this Church. In most cases it involves setting aside old habits, leaving old friends and associations, and stepping into a new society which is different and somewhat demanding” (in Conference Report, Apr. 1997, 66; or Ensign, May 1997, 47).

I will be the first to admit that I am not a great member missionary. I have never given a Book of Mormon to my mail carrier, I don't bear my testimony to the grocery checker. I really don't interact closely with anyone who is not a member of our Church. My friends are members, my daughter is too young to make her own friends, I don't work, and I don't even know my neighbors. Even if I did, I'm not a brave person in that way.

But this aspect of member-missionary work-- nurturing new converts, being a friend-- that is something I can do! And it is an important way to support the full-time missionaries in your area.

Pres. Hinckley also taught:

“Every convert needs three things:

“1. A friend in the Church to whom he can constantly turn, who will walk beside him, who will answer his questions, who will understand his problems.

“2. An assignment. Activity is the genius of this Church. It is the process by which we grow. Faith and love for the Lord are like the muscle of my arm. If I use them, they grow stronger. If I put them in a sling, they become weaker. Every convert deserves a responsibility. …

“3. Every convert must be ‘nourished by the good word of God’ (Moro. 6:4). It is imperative that he or she become affiliated with a priesthood quorum or the Relief Society, the Young Women, the Young Men, the Sunday School, or the Primary. He or she must be encouraged to come to sacrament meeting” (Ensign, May 1999, 108).

I may not hand out a lot of pass-along cards, but I say hello and introduce myself to every investigator the missionaries bring to church. I also ask them about themselves, how they found the missionaries, etc. I'm not trying to be their BFF, but I try so hard to be a friendly face and make them feel important by letting them know that I noticed them and am interested in their story.

The next step? Keep doing it! Say hi again the next time they come to church, and the next and the next and the next...

Another way to support the full-time missionaries? Feed them! A home-cooked meal is always appreciated and they can help you in your own missionary efforts.

Whatever they may be. :-)