On "Happily Ever After"

At the General Young Women Meeting a few weeks ago, President Dieter F. Uchtdorf gave an inspiring talk called "Your Happily Ever After."

I felt like this talk slapped me on the forehead and yelled, "Pay attention! This is for you!"

Let me give some background: I read a lot. Like, a lot. (I've read 26 books since January 1st.) Since I've been diagnosed, I've used reading for its escapism-- choosing to run away to a book than deal with reality. And it works, for the most part. I get away, and I don't have to face anything difficult or trying.

This idea of life as a story really grabbed me. Here I was escaping to stories for comfort, and not living out my own. When Pres. Uchtdorf introduced his theme, he said:

...[I]n most languages there exists a phrase as magical and full of promise as perhaps any in the world. That phrase is “Once upon a time.”

Aren’t those wonderful words to begin a story? “Once upon a time” promises something: a story of adventure and romance, a story of princesses and princes. It may include tales of courage, hope, and everlasting love. In many of these stories, nice overcomes mean and good overcomes evil. But perhaps most of all, I love it when we turn to the last page and our eyes reach the final lines and we see the enchanting words “And they lived happily ever after.”

Isn’t that what we all desire: to be the heroes and heroines of our own stories; to triumph over adversity; to experience life in all its beauty; and, in the end, to live happily ever after?

I wrote that last sentiment in my notebook: "Don't we all desire to be the hero or heroine of our own life's story?"

My personal answer is YES! I want to be the heroine! I want to be Elizabeth Bennet, Anne Shirley, Emma Woodhouse, Cinderella, Clary Fray and, of course, Bella Swan. I want to be them all! I want an exciting story that builds, climaxes, and resolves with myself coming out the other end victorious.

But that victory has to be over something. You can't win if you're not even in a fight. Or if you're not even participating. Pres. Uchtdorf explained that all heroines must overcome adversity. We all must experience sadness and trials before achieving our "happily ever after."

But why? Pres. Uchtdorf answers: "The scriptures tell us there must be opposition in all things, for without it we could not discern the sweet from the bitter. Would the marathon runner feel the triumph of finishing the race had she not felt the pain of the hours of pushing against her limits? Would the pianist feel the joy of mastering an intricate sonata without the painstaking hours of practice?"

In addition, adversity teaches us lessons that we could not learn any other way. In this way, we gain wisdom, strength and depth of character that will aid us in victory.

Pres. Uchtdorf counsels:

My dear young sisters, you need to know that you will experience your own adversity. None is exempt. You will suffer, be tempted, and make mistakes. You will learn for yourself what every heroine has learned: through overcoming challenges come growth and strength.

It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself, that determines how your life’s story will develop.

My life's story will be written about how I behaved when trials came my way. Did I shrink or run away? Did I stay and fight, refusing to be defeated? I'm choosing the latter. It's a tough choice when some days I feel like I'd rather just do nothing, but I'm going to fight and I'm going to overcome. I'm choosing courage over cowardice. And I think Elizabeth Bennet would do the same.

Personal Progress and Duty to God

The period of my life that really solidified my testimony of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints were the formative years I spent in Young Women's. It is where I first heard a sincere testimony from someone my age; where I learned that women can go on missions,too; where I decided that whether my family could be there or not, I was getting married in the temple. It was the most pivotal and strengthening group that I have ever been a part of.

One of the greatest learning experiences I had in Young Women's was earning my Personal Progress award. At the time we had to do four 25-hour projects in different areas. I still remember meeting with Andrea, our personal progress leader, and discussing what values I wanted to focus on, what types of projects would help me to improve in those areas, and setting goals and deadlines. I still use these planning and goal-setting skills today and it is because of those projects that I know how to play at least 10 hymns on the piano for times when the ward is desperate.

That is why I am so glad there was such an emphasis on the youth to complete their Duty to God and Personal Progress. I think the most beneficial knowledge that someone can gain is that spiritual goals are just as important (if not more so) as academic and professional goals. And that there are always spiritual mentors within our families and our wards to help us in times when we struggle. I especially loved the story that one of the mothers told that she has been helping her fourth daughter complete her personal progress and wished she had done the same for her first three daughters. I can only imagine how much more special the daughter's teenage years have been being able to watch her mother grow spiritually alongside herself.

I plan on helping my daughters and sons with these programs because I feel that it gives teenagers an active role in realizing that they are indeed sons and daughters of a Heavenly Father that loves them.

For The Strength of Youth

In Sunday School this week, someone brought up the point that the fact that we're over 18 doesn't mean we shouldn't live by the standards prescribed in the For The Strength of Youth pamphlet.

This was such an "ah-ha" moment, I knew I'd have to share it here. Of course, we don't stop living the standards just because we're "grown-ups!" But I probably hadn't read For The Strength of Youth since I was 17, so I went home, dug up my copy and read it. I didn't have any earth-shattering revelations or really even learn anything new, but it was a good refresher. And a reminder to recommit to living the standards I agreed to as a youth.

I encourage all of you to revisit the booklet and recommit to living the standards for yourself.

You can find the pamphlet on the Church's new youth-oriented web site: http://youth.lds.org.

Make sure you watch this video while you're there (I totally love it): https://beta.lds.org/youth/mormon-messages/video/a-brand-new-year-for-the-strength-of-youth?locale=eng